The Boys and Their Baby by Larry Wolff

Author:Larry Wolff [Wolff, Larry]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-307-81899-7
Publisher: Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group
Published: 2012-09-26T00:00:00+00:00

Conrad Winterfeldt

P.S. I am sending you a copy of Death in Venice, in English, along with this letter.

P.P.S. Who is the woman I once saw following me when I was following you and your lover? She looked very unhappy.

Dear Adam,

Sleazy and sneaky? Just because you are carrying on wildly with both Lucinda and Mamie, and neither one knows about the other, while I, your former lover, am selected to know all about both? You, sleazy and sneaky? Adam, what a babe you are. Certainly I would not say that you are the sort of person one would have crushes on, but perhaps you are such a babe that it makes you irresistible, at any rate to high school students. Incidentally, don’t mess around with your students, one way or another. It is pedagogically unsound, morally questionable, and probably illegal.

Besides, you aren’t gay. You don’t have enough character to be gay. Sorry. I get the feeling that your astounding discovery about your roommate is intended to lead you into some utterly hypocritical and affected confusion about your own sexual identity. Don’t even bother wondering. Remember, you are the gallant lover of Lulu and Amelia. Remember (as if there were any danger of your forgetting!) that you and Huck were freshman roommates at Yale, possibly the least potentially gay connection in the whole kingdom of Ivy League sexuality. Do not think that any of your sexual hints or poses are going to make an impression on me of all people. Remember, I know you pretty well.

By the way, someone called here last week and asked for you (you are still listed in the Boston phone book, of course), and I said you didn’t live here anymore, and he said he was your freshman roommate at Yale, and I said you were living in San Francisco with your freshman roommate and he said he was also your freshman roommate and could he have your phone number, and I said I didn’t have it but gave him your address and said he could find the number, probably under Huck’s last name whatever that might be. Did you have a third roommate in college? He sounds creepy. Do you suppose it was actually some lovestruck high school student who plans to send flowers?

Actually I thought you and I might have a chance to have an abusive reunion in California, because Klingenstein is going to the Melville conference at Berkeley next month and I had thought of going with him, but now his wifey, suspicious little thing, insists on going along herself to keep an eye on her great white whale. So, alas, I will be staying home in Boston with Dreiser. How I should have loved to see you! How I should have cherished the opportunity to meet Anaconda and Luellen! Klingenstein took me to Walden Pond after dark one evening last week, and for a chilly but passionate half hour we went at it in the woods in the imagined presence of Henry David Thoreau.

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